When he heard him say “back to the ranks,” Xie Lian blinked. He touched his neck, and only then did he notice that the cursed shackle was gone.
Jun Wu smiled. “As expected. I was not mistaken. It took you even less time to return than I anticipated.”
Xie Lian slowly regained himself. He flashed a small smile in return, but his was a bitter one.
After catching his breath, he spoke up. “My Lord, I want to beg something of you.”
“Permitted,” Jun Wu said.
“Are you not going to ask what it is first?” Xie Lian asked.
“Since you would be asking for a gift upon return to the Heavenly Court regardless, let today’s incident serve as my gift to you for returning to the ranks.”
The corners of Xie Lian’s lips tugged, and he rose to his feet. He looked Jun Wu squarely in the eyes and said with the utmost respect, “Pray My Lord banish me to the Mortal Realm once more.”
Hearing this, Jun Wu’s smile faded. “Whyever for?”
“I’ve done wrong,” Xie Lian explained the honest truth. “I was the one who unleashed the second plague of Human Face Disease. Even though the consequences weren’t as severe as the first.”
This time, the only casualty was a nameless ghost, and perhaps no one in the world had cared for him. In the end, the consequences of this second plague weren’t nearly as severe.
“If you knew what was wrong, then you are already in the right,” Jun Wu said slowly.
However, Xie Lian shook his head. “Just knowing is not enough. If I make a mistake, I should be the one punished. But I committed the wrong, and the one who took the punishment for me was…”
He trailed off, then raised his head once more.
“So as punishment, I pray My Lord will grant me a cursed shackle—no, two cursed shackles. One to seal away my spiritual powers, another to disperse all my luck and fortune.”
Jun Wu frowned slightly. “Disperse all your luck and fortune? Will that not make you unlucky beyond belief—truly make you a God of Misfortune?”
Xie Lian had resented being called a God of Misfortune; he was repulsed by the very idea and considered it a great humiliation. However, he no longer cared about things like that.
“If I am to become a God of Misfortune, then so be it. As long as I know deep down that I’m not.”
Once his fortune was dispersed, it would naturally flow to the less fortunate. It would be a form of atonement.
“It will be very embarrassing,” Jun Wu reminded him.
“It doesn’t matter,” Xie Lian said. “And to be honest, it feels like…I’m almost used to it by now.”
It wasn’t something he’d wanted to get used to, but once he did, it really felt like nothing could harm him.
Jun Wu watched him. “Xianle, you have to understand that you will no longer be a god if you have no spiritual power.”
Xie Lian sighed. “My Lord, I know that better than anyone.” After a pause, he said in a tone that was a little frustrated and a little forlorn, “People say I’m a god, and so I have spiritual powers. But in truth, I’m…not the god they thought I was, and I might not be as invincible as they hoped.
“Would a real god be such a failure? I wanted to protect my people, but I let their corpses spread across the land; I wished to avenge them, but at the very last minute I abandoned the plot. White No-Face wasn’t wrong about me being a failure.
“If I’m no longer a god, then so be it.”
Jun Wu gazed at him intently, and after a long while, he said, “Xianle has grown up.”
That should’ve been something Xie Lian heard from his elders. Unfortunately, his father and mother had no more chances to say it.
A moment later, Jun Wu continued, “Since this is the path you have chosen, I will do as you ask. However, I will need a reason to banish you to the Mortal Realm.”
He couldn’t just casually banish a heavenly official like this was a child’s game—otherwise, how would the world see the heavens?
But Xie Lian had an idea. “My Lord, I don’t believe we’ve ever sparred with everything we’ve got.”
Jun Wu instantly understood what he meant and smiled. “Xianle, I am injured.”
“Me too,” Xie Lian said. “So we’re even.”
Jun Wu nodded. “If that is the case, then I will not hold back.”
Xie Lian smiled, his eyes brightening with excitement at the prospect. “I won’t either.”
***
His Highness the Crown Prince was banished again.
After his smashing and grandiose second Heavenly Tribulation, the Crown Prince of Xianle rampaged across the heavens with fierce belligerence. Before even one incense time had passed, he was knocked down below once more by the Heavenly Emperor. None of the heavenly officials could figure out what that man was thinking.
But Xie Lian couldn’t figure out what the other heavenly officials were thinking either.
Were they really that curious what he was up to? Watching him day after day, disguising themselves as mortals to watch him, disguising themselves as animals to watch him—they had been stalking him for days! Was a grown man laying bricks really that interesting?
As he wondered about this, the foreman behind him began to shout.
“Newbie! You, yes you, I’m talking to you! Get back to work! Stop being lazy!”
Xie Lian hastily sat up with a loud, “Oh!”
And then, he picked up a ragged cattail fan and started fanning the flames in front of him. He was seated in front of a small stove stacked on several bricks, and upon the stove was a large pot of rice that bubbled as it cooked.
This was a construction site, where he was paid to haul earth and mud. However, the bricks had already been transported, so Xie Lian’s task for the moment was cooking. He cooked and cooked, and as he worked, two carriages approached, hauling two very large divine statues for the two newly built temples nearby. Xie Lian absentmindedly tossed whatever was at hand into the pot, stealing glances at the statues as he did.
The two divine statues were carried into their respective temples. From within the hall of the temple on the left, he heard cheers.
“General Xuan Zhen is great! General Xuan Zhen is generous and kind!”
Xie Lian was speechless. Using “generous and kind” to praise Mu Qing; were those devotees serious?!
But they apparently had their reasons—after all, everyone knew that Mu Qing had ascended because he had cleared away the vengeful spirits that stubbornly tarried about the old capital of Xianle. Calling that “generous and kind” wasn’t unreasonable. In any case, everyone in the old capital of Xianle was very grateful for him.
From within the hall of the temple to the right, he heard roars from another set of devotees who refused to be beaten by those of the left temple.
“General Ju Yang is great! General Ju Yang is brave and mighty!”
Xie Lian nodded. To this, he had no objections—although that praise might not hold true in the face of women.
The devotees on both sides were screaming with all their might, doing all they could to be louder than each other until Xie Lian’s ears ached. He sighed and rubbed his forehead as he thought, Why must they be like this?
If they hated each other so much, wouldn’t their problems be solved by not building temples right next to each other?
The answer to that was: of course not! This area was a bustling domain with excellent feng shui, and the devotees of those two heavenly officials would never abandon such tempting land solely for the sake of avoiding each other. They had to do all they could to steal each other’s worshippers and disgust one another.
It didn’t take long before the devotees from both sides progressed from yelling to fighting. Over by the stove, Xie Lian determined that the time was about right, so he started banging the pot cover with the spatula and calling out loudly, “Everyone, stop fighting! Come eat!”
It was the height of the brawl, so who would bother listening to him? Xie Lian shook his head and opened the pot cover, and the fragrance wafted ten miles around. Now he’d done it—the brawl instantly stopped, and everyone started howling.
