Feng Xin instantly stood up. “You… Where did these things come from?!”
Xie Lian didn’t bother to look up as he replied; he just sat on the ground and counted the haul. “There’s no need to be like that. I paid a visit to a big household in the city. Relax, no one saw me.”
Feng Xin’s eyes were round and bulging. “You—” Remembering just then that the king and queen were in the next room, he lowered his voice. “You stole them?!”
“You don’t need to look at me like that,” Xie Lian said. “Everyone’s having a hard time. This will make things easier.”
“You still shouldn’t have stolen them!” Feng Xin exclaimed. “We can just busk!”
“And how much do we earn from killing ourselves performing on the streets?” Xie Lian said.
Feng Xin staggered back a couple of steps. It was the first time Xie Lian saw him look like he was about to faint. He finally steadied himself and took a moment to make sure he hadn’t heard wrong. Then he mumbled, “What made you this way?”
Xie Lian looked up. “What way?”
Feng Xin was furious. “I don’t want to lecture you, but just look at yourself—at what you’ve become! I’ve already stopped asking about the robbery, so how did things get even worse?!”
Xie Lian snorted. “I knew it.”
“Knew what?” Feng Xin asked.
Xie Lian rose to his feet. “I knew that robbery thing was still on your mind. You wanted to ask me, but you didn’t have the heart. You’ve thought about it a thousand times, right? Don’t obsess about it anymore. I’ll tell you.”
Step by step, he closed in on Feng Xin. “It’s true. I robbed someone.”
Feng Xin was forced back a step. “You…” Then he advanced a step and hissed in anger, “We’ve been passing our days in such hardship, and for what? If you were willing to do those things, then we could’ve done them already. Why suffer until today?! What are you doing, throwing away all your efforts?! Are you still the same Royal Highness I used to know?!”
“You’re right. Why have we suffered until today?” Xie Lian said.
Feng Xin was taken aback, and Xie Lian continued, “What was I like in the past? I didn’t talk back when I was cursed at, didn’t fight back when I was beaten, and always overestimated myself. I was so determined to ‘save the common people.’ What kind of person does all that? A dumbass! Do you think being a dumbass is better? Do you think that’s the kind of person I should be? Are you going to be very shocked if I’m not?”
Feng Xin was stunned. “Are you crazy? Why do you have to say it like that?”
“You’re wrong. I’m not crazy,” Xie Lian said. “I’ve just suddenly come to my senses. Now I know that the past me was the crazy one.”
“Why are you being like this? When did you become this way?” Feng Xin mumbled. “I…I really don’t know… I’m… Why did I follow you all this time—?”
“Then stop following,” Xie Lian said.
Feng Xin couldn’t wrap his head around that. “What?”
“I said, don’t follow me anymore,” Xie Lian repeated.
Then he slammed the door.
Four hours later, there was finally some rustling outside the room and low voices speaking.
It seemed Feng Xin was bidding farewell to Xie Lian’s mother and father. Feng Xin’s voice was extremely low, the queen’s voice was choked with sobs, and the king didn’t say much, but there was a lot of coughing. The door opened a moment later, then closed. Feng Xin’s voice vanished, and the sound of his footsteps grew more and more distant.
Feng Xin had left.
Xie Lian was still shut in his room, emotionless and expressionless. A moment later, he closed his eyes.
He’d finally left.
Ever since Mu Qing left them, Xie Lian had been terrified of this possibility—that one day, Feng Xin would leave too. But he’d become so scared of it that he could no longer endure the torment. Rather than dragging it out, slowly grinding away all the kindness and friendship like sharpening a knife until nothing remained—until they loathed the sight of each other—it was better to make it explode now.
Before Feng Xin left, Xie Lian had been afraid. Now that Feng Xin was gone, he wasn’t scared anymore.
But even though he no longer felt fear, he felt a deeper agony.
Xie Lian had initially held a one-in-a-million bit of hope at the bottom of his heart. He’d hoped that Feng Xin would still stay even if Xie Lian admitted he had done things he shouldn’t have, even if he became the worst version of himself. After all, the two had never left each other’s sides since he turned fourteen and Feng Xin was selected to be his personal attendant. They were master and servant, but more than that, they were friends. And Feng Xin had no one to care for aside from the crown prince either—or at most, him, and the king and queen.
But Feng Xin had really left.
Xie Lian had already guessed it would end like this, and he could understand it completely. He just couldn’t bear it for the moment.
Just then, the queen’s voice came from outside his silent room. “My son, I’m so sorry.”
Xie Lian couldn’t immediately think of a response. He crawled out of his bed and opened the door, then went out. “It’s got nothing to do with you,” he said tiredly.
The king and queen were both sitting at the old, creaky table. “Father and Mother dragged you down and made you do bad things for our sake. We even made you and Feng Xin argue,” the queen said.
Xie Lian forced a smile. “What bad things? Aren’t tales and legends full of stories about stealing from the rich to help the poor? Since Feng Xin’s gone, he’s gone. This is good, actually—with him gone, things will be more relaxed. Relaxed on both sides. You two just focus on healing. Tomorrow, we can buy the best medicine.”
However, the king glared at him. “I won’t use that money.”
The queen tugged at him covertly.
“Then what do you want?” Xie Lian demanded.
The king coughed a few more times. “You… Go chase after Feng Xin and bring him back. I don’t want this money.”
Although the queen was still tugging at him, she agreed. “Yes, why don’t you chase after Feng Xin? He’s your most loyal servant and your best friend—”
“The loyal servant is no more,” Xie Lian said. “We have money, so just use it. Don’t ask about anything else. I already told you, you don’t understand these things.”
After a long silence, the queen said, “I’m so sorry, my son. Mom and Dad can see that you’ve been struggling very hard on your own. But we’re only mortals, so we can’t help you at all—you have to take care of us on top of everything else.”
Xie Lian was out of energy to say more, so he placated them with empty words of comfort before sending them back to their room. To try to clear his mind, Xie Lian unwrapped his white silk band and stripped off all his clothes, then took a quick bath before passing out in bed.
He slept so deeply that when he woke the next day, he wondered blearily, How come Feng Xin didn’t wake me?
It took some time before he remembered that Feng Xin had left.
Xie Lian flipped over and sat up, falling into a daze. But there was something else—even if Feng Xin had left, what about his parents? Why hadn’t his father and mother come to rouse him either?
Normally, he would’ve heard the king coughing by now. That sound had never ceased, so why was it so quiet today?
Xie Lian suddenly felt uneasy. He put on his clothes and got out of bed, then reached for his silk band—but it was missing. He pushed open the door to the room next to his.
“Mother, have you seen my—”
The moment he opened the door, his pupils instantly shrank to two minuscule dots.
He had found his white silk band.
The silk band was hanging from the beam. Two unmoving figures dangled from it. Their bodies had long since gone stiff.
They were the bodies of his father and mother.
Xie Lian wondered if perhaps he was still dreaming. He staggered, reaching out to support himself on the wall. But he was swaying so badly that he couldn’t catch himself and slipped down along the wall instead.
